5:42PM - Just got to Grand Central and called Mayor and he's already at the stadium. I can either sprint through Grand Central to catch a train that gets to the stadium at 6PM or lollygag and get there 15 minutes later. Since I bought the new Lady Gaga album on Amazon for $1 this morning and am listening to the climax of "The Edge of Glory" at the moment, it's sprint all the way.
5:54 - Two unrelated facts: #1) I'm about to meet up with Mayor, who is giving me a free Yanks ticket via his brother-in-law Dan and #2) the Gaga song playing now is called "Government Hooker". Unrelated facts. (Picture 1: The new (to me) Metro-North station near Yankee Stadium)
7:47 - I'll admit that I've grossly underestimated Girardi's managing skill if I find out that he sat Swisher on purpose just to pull him off the bench during the impending rain delay later on to do some goofy stuff on the infield rain tarp.
8:25 - Some Canadians have started the wave to see what Yanks fans will embarass the franchise by joining in. Somebody check to see which side of the St. Lawrence River the Mayor was born on.
Two potentially relevant historical notes. 1. The last time I saw the Yanks play the Jays they smoked Phil Hughes in his MLB debut. 2. The last time I saw Bartolo Gravy he pitched a great game and lost 1-0 in the last game I ever saw live at the old Yankees Stadium. Although, that night he pitched under the name Bartolo Colon. So what did I learn with tonight's game added to this information?
1. Don't go to Jays games. They own me (or they own bad pitching).
2. Bartolo might be done giving me all of his gravy. He might have been done giving me that gravy back in the old stadium.
3. A couple times tonight, Jeter and Posada were up with runners on and despite their stats, I still expected some "Core Four" magic. Tonight I learned that those days are pretty much over.
4. The Lady Gaga song that I sprinted to early in the evening ("Edge of Glory") might describe the Yanks. They had high aspirations coming into this season and they're not in their primes, but they're certainly on the edge of something. Based on what I saw tonight and what I've seen so far this season, the Yanks are really a couple of years past their edge of glory (reached in 2009). Until they can get those averages up and get hot, they're really on the edge of nothing (Picture 4: The Old Yankee Bat that once stood next to the stadium is now over near the Metro-North station).
6:35 - After meeting Mayor, getting to our seats and catching up on some TV shows (both agreeing that through 6 episodes, Game of Thrones might be the best show ever), Mayor shows off his and his camera's stalking prowess by getting a closeup of Kim Jones by the dugout from our near left field foul pole seats. Also, a storm is about to come in and Mayor is tracking it on his iPhone.
6:57 - They just played both national anthems. The Canadian players on Toronto dipped their bats into a vat of pudding...as is Canadian tradition.
7:05 - I unveiled my new nickname for tonight's Yanks starter: Bartolo Gravy. I expected nothing from him, so anything we get is gravy. Oh, and he probably smells more like gravy than cologne. (Picture 2: These are good seats, but we have a serious problem if a bat ends up in the stands here)
7:12 -
Me: I saw the movie Catfish and now I'll never join Facebook.
Mayor: Is that the movie with Hugh Jackman?
Me: No, that's Swordfish with Hugh Jackman and Haley Berry's boobs.
Mayor: Oh is "Catfish" about Catfish Hunter?
Me: No!!!
...yes Mayor, because a movie about Catfish Hunter would make me not want to join Facebook.
7:16 - Bautista just hit a 400 foot HR. If 2011 post steroid MLB were Game of Thrones, someone would say to Bautista, "You're not playing honorably." And Bautista would respond by pointing to Jeter's batting average and extra base hits and saying, "No. But he is." (You gotta watch Thrones)
Me: I saw the movie Catfish and now I'll never join Facebook.
Mayor: Is that the movie with Hugh Jackman?
Me: No, that's Swordfish with Hugh Jackman and Haley Berry's boobs.
Mayor: Oh is "Catfish" about Catfish Hunter?
Me: No!!!
...yes Mayor, because a movie about Catfish Hunter would make me not want to join Facebook.
7:16 - Bautista just hit a 400 foot HR. If 2011 post steroid MLB were Game of Thrones, someone would say to Bautista, "You're not playing honorably." And Bautista would respond by pointing to Jeter's batting average and extra base hits and saying, "No. But he is." (You gotta watch Thrones)
7:28 - The 1st inning ends with Jays pitcher striking out the side. Having Teixeira is like having Doug Mientkiewicz's glove...with Doug Mientkiewicz's bat.
7:47 - I'll admit that I've grossly underestimated Girardi's managing skill if I find out that he sat Swisher on purpose just to pull him off the bench during the impending rain delay later on to do some goofy stuff on the infield rain tarp.
8:25 - Some Canadians have started the wave to see what Yanks fans will embarass the franchise by joining in. Somebody check to see which side of the St. Lawrence River the Mayor was born on.
8:29 - Mayor and his buddies are discussing whether or not he should ask out any of the girls who are sitting next to us. Instead, can we ask them if one of them will stand him up? (Picture 3: Me & the Mayor)
8:40 - I'm not gonna say who, but someone near me looked at one of the girl's IDs for a few seconds when she passed it down to the beer vendor to buy a beer. I'm not gonna say who, but this guy must be trying to hit for the stalking prowess cycle tonight.
8:57 - Uh oh. The Gravy Train came off the track. Big inning for the Jays and they're up 6-1. Did you know that I can tell how many runs we're losing by just by counting the number of NYPD officers lining the outfield wall in between innings?
8:40 - I'm not gonna say who, but someone near me looked at one of the girl's IDs for a few seconds when she passed it down to the beer vendor to buy a beer. I'm not gonna say who, but this guy must be trying to hit for the stalking prowess cycle tonight.
8:57 - Uh oh. The Gravy Train came off the track. Big inning for the Jays and they're up 6-1. Did you know that I can tell how many runs we're losing by just by counting the number of NYPD officers lining the outfield wall in between innings?
9:14 - Ugh. The Yanks got our hopes upby putting a couple runners on, but only got one run in. Jorge Posada is beginning to come into full focus in Haley Joel Osment's eye sight.
9:21 - Mayor just rooster blocked himself with a giant tub of popcorn, which prevented girls from walking by him. #FML
9:29 - You know how I know the Blue Jays are up 4 runs with 6 outs to go? The wave is happening again. "Ohh Can-ah-dah!"
9:45 - Just once I want a baseball player to make a snow cone catch and open up his mitt to reveal an actual snow cone. I tweeted this during the game and Jon responded with a basketball potty shot tweet. Well, Mayor and I were not familiar with that type of shot, so we YouTube'd it and you don't even wanna see some of the stuff that came up alongside a LeBron James half court potty shot.
9:53 - The girls in front of us finally roped us into doing their "Ahh (Clap!) Wooo!" cheer. They'd tried earlier to no avail, but our standards had lowered (I think because the wave had tainted the stadium). The girls and Mayor started talking about tagging each other in photos and I thought about excusing myself, but luckily Curtis Granderson made a sliding catch to change the subject.
10:07 - Curtis Granderson strikes out to end the game and the Jays win 7-3. Umm, please tell me that Yanks hitting coach Kevin Long has been and is still on an extended winter vacation. Please don't tell me that he's in the dugout somewhere.
9:21 - Mayor just rooster blocked himself with a giant tub of popcorn, which prevented girls from walking by him. #FML
9:29 - You know how I know the Blue Jays are up 4 runs with 6 outs to go? The wave is happening again. "Ohh Can-ah-dah!"
9:45 - Just once I want a baseball player to make a snow cone catch and open up his mitt to reveal an actual snow cone. I tweeted this during the game and Jon responded with a basketball potty shot tweet. Well, Mayor and I were not familiar with that type of shot, so we YouTube'd it and you don't even wanna see some of the stuff that came up alongside a LeBron James half court potty shot.
9:53 - The girls in front of us finally roped us into doing their "Ahh (Clap!) Wooo!" cheer. They'd tried earlier to no avail, but our standards had lowered (I think because the wave had tainted the stadium). The girls and Mayor started talking about tagging each other in photos and I thought about excusing myself, but luckily Curtis Granderson made a sliding catch to change the subject.
10:07 - Curtis Granderson strikes out to end the game and the Jays win 7-3. Umm, please tell me that Yanks hitting coach Kevin Long has been and is still on an extended winter vacation. Please don't tell me that he's in the dugout somewhere.
Two potentially relevant historical notes. 1. The last time I saw the Yanks play the Jays they smoked Phil Hughes in his MLB debut. 2. The last time I saw Bartolo Gravy he pitched a great game and lost 1-0 in the last game I ever saw live at the old Yankees Stadium. Although, that night he pitched under the name Bartolo Colon. So what did I learn with tonight's game added to this information?
1. Don't go to Jays games. They own me (or they own bad pitching).
2. Bartolo might be done giving me all of his gravy. He might have been done giving me that gravy back in the old stadium.
3. A couple times tonight, Jeter and Posada were up with runners on and despite their stats, I still expected some "Core Four" magic. Tonight I learned that those days are pretty much over.
4. The Lady Gaga song that I sprinted to early in the evening ("Edge of Glory") might describe the Yanks. They had high aspirations coming into this season and they're not in their primes, but they're certainly on the edge of something. Based on what I saw tonight and what I've seen so far this season, the Yanks are really a couple of years past their edge of glory (reached in 2009). Until they can get those averages up and get hot, they're really on the edge of nothing (Picture 4: The Old Yankee Bat that once stood next to the stadium is now over near the Metro-North station).
Despite the beat down, I had a great time at my first 2011 Yanks game with the Mayor and company and we were very fortunate to get the game in without it beginning to pour, as was expected. I just hope next time the Yanks can pour on some runs and give me something to do the "Ahh (Clap!) Wooo!" cheer to.
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3 quick thoughts:
ReplyDelete1. Catfish story: riiiidiculous
2. Quick glance at the photo of you guys: I thought it was a pic of you and an actual Yankee player for a sec. Don't know if that says more about Mayor or baseball players.
3. Giant tubs of popcorn are inherently rooster blockers, in several ways.